{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"Emily Lisner's Portfolio","provider_url":"http:\/\/emilylisner.wordpress.com","author_name":"emilyisadummy","author_url":"http:\/\/emilylisner.wordpress.com\/author\/emilyisadumby\/","title":"Why I Write Final","type":"link","html":"
Writing: The Identity Crisis<\/p>\n
The long drawn out paragraphs.\u00a0 The brutally honest opinions.\u00a0 The often uncomfortable personal emotions. Yes, we have all seen it before\u2014the Facebook status. Between voicing political and religious views, or a bad breakup, many people use Facebook as their own personal diary.\u00a0 While some posts get hundreds of \u201clikes\u201d others receive none.\u00a0 When a status gets a \u201clike\u201d it provides the writer with validation that someone has appreciated his or her opinion.\u00a0 While people have no problem employing one hundred percent honesty on social media outlets such as Facebook or Twitter, it seems as if that same righteousness is not engaged in all forms of writing.\u00a0 While I certainly have no problem broadcasting who I really am in my 140 character tweets, I most defiantly find it more challenging to remain true to myself in all forms of writing. For me, writing always had an implication of judgment.\u00a0 Although Facebook and Twitter undoubtedly provoke judgment, it still feels less risky and is easier to write from the heart.\u00a0 I write because it has the ability to evoke emotion, push social norms, and unleash our creative ability.<\/p>\n
It took me a while to realize I was already a writer.\u00a0 In forth grade I wrote a history paper that stayed on the fridge for a year and a half and by sixth grade I was the queen of AOL instant messenger away messages.\u00a0 At this point in my life, I was not concerned with receiving a good grade or saying what I thought I had to in order to fit in. My hatred towards writing arose when assignments began to be labeled as \u201cwriting.\u201d Similar to food that tastes delicious before you realize what ingredients are inside, writing was fun and carefree till it I realized what it really consisted of.\u00a0 My enjoyment was shattered after the start of the dreaded five-paragraph essay, countless grammar rules that I could never seem to memorize, and the rubric that made my writing feel as confined as a jail.\u00a0 Writing was no longer freeing and pleasurable, it in fact became my worst nightmare.\u00a0 Thus began the slow and painful death of my love for writing.<\/p>\n
As a browsed the LSA course guide attempting to find a somewhat enjoyable topic for my required English 125 class, I was shocked to see a topic on Kanye West\u2019s \u201cCollege Dropout\u201d album.\u00a0 It was during this semester that I began to remember why I enjoyed writing so long ago.\u00a0 The pivotal moment in this discovery was when I was writing an essay on Kanye West\u2019s song \u201cSpaceship.\u201d\u00a0 After spending hours analyzing the lyrics and looking for deeper meanings and connections, I started to put my ideas on the paper. As my essay progressed, I realized that I had learned something from myself <\/i>as I wrote.\u00a0 My essay was full of complexity and creativity and was the first piece of my own writing that ever had the ability to make me think. I turned in the paper without the slightest concern of how it would be graded because frankly I was too proud of it to care. I learned that I write to learn from myself.<\/p>\n
I actually enjoyed writing papers for Writing 125, and it opened my eyes to what topics I actually enjoyed writing about.\u00a0 The summer following my year of writing revelations, I was able to combine my newfound interests (music and writing) into an internship at Eagle Rock Entertainment in London.\u00a0 As one of the largest producers and distributors of music programming for television, DVD, and digital media I was able to see if I had found a potential career.\u00a0 Throughout my internship experience, I had chances to explore different parts of the company.\u00a0 About two weeks into my internship, I was given the task of writing synopsis of episodes of \u201cBehind The Music.\u201d It was soon recognized that this task was something I enjoyed and excelled at. While I absolutely enjoyed my experience writing about music, I couldn\u2019t help but to wonder what other genres of writing would spark my interest.<\/p>\n
While writing about topics that I am knowledgeable and comfortable with are certainly agreeable, I notice the most self-growth when the topic of writing makes me uneasy.\u00a0 One topic that made me particularly uneasy was when I had to write a response to Eve Ensler\u2019s \u201c The Vagina Monologues<\/i>\u201d in a Comparative Literature class.\u00a0 The assignment was not a simple reflection or summary of what we had read, but actually asked us to write our own Vagina Monologue.\u00a0 At first this topic felt bizarre and uncomfortable.\u00a0 Not only did we have to turn this piece of writing into our Professor, but we were also required to read it out loud to our entire class.\u00a0 I felt immense pressure while writing this paper because I knew that I would have to share such a personal narrative with all of my peers.\u00a0 However, I actually felt liberated when I heard my own words out loud.\u00a0 Writing on such a personal topic allowed me to push social norms and share my personal thoughts with my fellow classmates.<\/p>\n
I have a hard time determining what it is that motivates me to write. I still need a little push in order to find the inspiration to write, which usually derives from a class assignment.\u00a0 I am optimistic that one day the inspiration will come from myself, and I will write for the sheer gratification.\u00a0 However, until that day comes I would feel dishonest considering myself as a writer.\u00a0 Writers are people that I have put on a pedestal; their writing put me to bed at night throughout my child hood, opened my imagination, and inspired me to do the same.\u00a0 These talented individuals do not write what they think others want to hear, but rather what they want others to think after reading it.\u00a0 Although I have produced work that I am proud of, I have yet to find use for it outside the classroom.\u00a0 As I grow as a writer, I hope that I can discover a broader audience for my writing.<\/p>\n
I have dreams of becoming a published author: an author that can open a child\u2019s imagination and inspire them the same way that I was. My infatuation with writing a children\u2019s book series began when I started babysitting in high school.\u00a0 Most of the children I babysat begged for a book before I put them to sleep.\u00a0 One book led to another and before I knew it I had read a child almost ten books.\u00a0 I found myself engrossed in the illustrations and simple messages that were taught to the child through a simple plot line.\u00a0 As I read these books, I found myself thinking of alternative endings or ways that I think the book could have been better or more engaging.\u00a0 Thus, I asked myself: why can\u2019t I <\/i>write this book?<\/p>\n
I have thought of plenty ideas for children\u2019s book series, but find myself getting caught up in the uncertainty of the unknown process.\u00a0 I am scared of the unknown, but how will I ever be a writer if I don\u2019t start somewhere? I am confident in my ability to write a book, but I am unconfident about how to begin.\u00a0 I have started by a simple word document on my computer with ideas about what I would like to write about.\u00a0 Every once in a while I open this document; in hopes that maybe I will start the process on one of these ideas.\u00a0 Each time, I close the document feeling discouraged and mad at myself for not trusting myself more.\u00a0 However discouraged I may feel now, I am confident that one day I will feel inspired enough to sit down and follow through with writing a children\u2019s book.<\/p>\n
My future is still hazy, as it has become challenging to cluster all of my diverse interests into a singular career.\u00a0 Now that writing has become such a large part of my academic and personal life, I can\u2019t imagine finding a profession that does not include it. Writing is what makes me think, what makes me care, and what I hope can make a difference.\u00a0 Through my journey as a writing minor, I hope to find the inner motivation to write for myself and not for others.\u00a0 I am confident that I will be exposed to other genres and topics of writing that may spark an interest that I would have never imagined.\u00a0 Writing 220 is giving me the rare chance to strive to enhance my writing, not my GPA. As I advance as a writer, I plan to view each writing opportunity as a blank Facebook status.\u00a0 While I do hope that it receives \u201clikes,\u201d I am more concerned with being true to myself.<\/p>\n"}